As leaders we want individuals on our teams to succeed and as parents we want our children to succeed. When Adam Grant, an organizational psychologist at the University of Pennsylvania, was asked about the similarities between leadership and parenting, he suggested tough love is a critical skill in both contexts. I’ve recreated Grant’s “Tough Love Matrix of Leadership and Parenting” below. Tough love combines two essential elements: caring deeply and setting high expectations

Imagine two professionals on the same team. Both are smart. Both care about doing good work. The first is highly competent. Their work is accurate, efficient, and technically strong. They meet expectations consistently, but spend little time building relationships beyond what is required to get tasks done. The second is also competent. Not exceptional at everything, but solid and reliable. In addition to doing the work, this individual invests time in relationships. They prio

My work provides me the opportunity to interact with a large number of highly motivated people who are eager to put their skills to use. Most are excellent individual contributors, but when it comes to managing others many of them struggle to know how to delegate. The will/skill matrix is a helpful framework when leading a team or managing others. The two dimensions of “will” and “skill” can help you understand which tasks are appropriate for delegation. “Will” speaks to an i

A couple years ago I was at an outdoor gathering with a large group of friends and acquaintances. I was standing alone near the door of a pavilion watching my children play in the distance when a friendly woman who I had met a few times walked up and said, “I know you don’t like small talk, but isn’t it a beautiful day?” It was a beautiful day, but I was struck most by what came before her question. She reminded me that I had once told her I struggle with small talk. I do str

Most employees prefer to receive fair and accurate constructive feedback from their managers, and employees who do receive regular feedback that is delivered appropriately perform better. However, most managers avoid giving constructive feedback and when they do give feedback they don’t do it well. Too many managers have not been trained to give performance feedback. In fact, if you have been trained, it’s likely you’ve received bad advice. For example, common advice is to us

Early in my career I sometimes felt like I was reacting to events throughout the workday. The direction of my day could easily be altered by an interruption from a colleague stopping by my office or an email that someone else thought was urgent. As a result, I found myself working longer hours to accomplish what needed to get done. Then I found and began using Stephen Covey’s time management matrix from his best selling book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. As depict

Aligning your values with your work impacts your job satisfaction and health. Research from McKinsey has found that “people who say they are ‘living their purpose’ at work report levels of well-being that are five times higher than those of people who aren’t.” Not surprisingly, these individuals are also more engaged in their work. McKinsey developed a matrix based on nine personal values that are recognized across cultures. I recreated the matrix below. The horizontal axis r

Not satisfied? Explore your options. Even the most optimistic among us have good reason to be restless, disappointed, fed up, or even...

When given the opportunity to present our ideas, we all want to perform well, and most of us have heard public speaking advice that...