Some thoughts arrive unexpectedly. Others return again and again. You revisit the mistake you made. You rethink the conversation that did not sit right with you. You imagine everything that could go wrong tomorrow. The thoughts may begin automatically, but the longer they stay, the more of your attention and energy they consume. Over time, preparing what I think of as a redirection thought has helped me. If you find yourself dwelling on a specific thought repeatedly, you can

I never heard my grandfather say anything bad about anyone. Sometime in college I started to notice that he had a way of finding the positive angle and saying it warmly. The phrase if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all took on a different meaning for me after that. Interpreted literally, it can sound like a suggestion to avoid conflict or sidestep hard conversations. But the phrase is about how you say things, not whether you say them. Hard convers

Many communication challenges are not about what we say but how quickly we say it. This post explores how emotion labeling can help professionals slow the moment between feeling and responding so their message reflects intention rather than impulse.

Think of an interaction that has gone well for both you and the person you were communicating with. Now think of an interaction that didn’t go as well as you would have liked. In the first interaction, you were likely communicating from above the line. In the second, you were likely communicating from below the line. When we communicate from above the line, we are open to new ideas, we ask questions, and we are committed to growth and learning. Conversely, when we communicate

Early in my career, I didn’t give much thought to when I spoke up in department meetings. I contributed when I had something to say and stayed quiet when I didn’t. Then I started finding myself in meetings with higher-level decision makers. The stakes were different, the airtime was limited, and I realized the way I contributed needed to adjust. I mentioned that observation with a mentor, and he shared three questions I’ve been using ever since: Before you speak, ask yourself

Most meetings aren't memorable, but I recall attending one where an important topic was on the agenda, and I knew leaders within the organization attended with the intent to listen. However, when the dialogue headed in a direction that made one leader uncomfortable, he stopped listening and made a variety of statements I suspect he wishes he could take back. We’ve all been there. I’ve earned two degrees in communication, read books about listening, attended workshops on liste