Why Power Changes People and What We Can Do About It

Over the years, I’ve watched people move from roles with little formal authority to ones with real power—managers, department heads, directors, even presidents.

And I’ve noticed something strange.

Many of them start out grounded, collaborative, genuinely attuned to others. That’s often why they were elevated to new roles in the first place. But once they’re in power, something shifts. They interrupt more. They listen less. They prioritize their own perspective over others’.

Not everyone. But enough that I’ve started to ask: What happens when people step into power? And how can we help them stay connected to the qualities that earned them influence in the first place? 

The Power Paradox

Psychologist Dacher Keltner has studied this pattern extensively. Writing in Harvard Business Review he explains:

“While people usually gain power through traits and actions that advance the interests of others, such as empathy, collaboration, openness, fairness, and sharing, when they start to feel powerful or enjoy a position of privilege, those qualities begin to fade.”

Keltner calls this the power paradox: The very behaviors that help people gain power often disappear once they have it. 

His research, along with work by others, shows that people in power are more likely to:

• Interrupt and dominate conversations

• Act impulsively or rudely

• Prioritize their goals over others’

• Rationalize unethical behavior

Several studies support the idea that power reshapes how we relate to each other. Galinsky and colleagues found power reduces perspective taking. People become less likely to consider other points of view, which can lead to more self-serving behavior. Lammers and colleagues found that powerful individuals are more likely to condemn unethical behavior in others while excusing it in themselves—a pattern described as moral hypocrisy.

These findings explain how judgment and behavior of those in power can be subtly distorted, especially without intentional effort to counteract its effects.

Leadership Is Learned

Leadership is a skill people learn, and then relearn, especially as their responsibilities grow.

From a young age, we form ideas about leadership by watching teachers, managers, parents, and coaches. If those models prioritize control, dominance, and authority, we tend to assume that’s what leadership looks like. But when we’re exposed to leaders who ask questions, listen, collaborate, and empower others, we develop a different model of what leadership can look like.

This insight is central to Albert Bandura’s social learning theory, which explains how we learn behaviors by observing, imitating, and modeling others. If we want to cultivate leadership rooted in empathy and collaboration, we need to expose people, especially early in their careers, to leaders who demonstrate these qualities.

Over time, leadership becomes less about what we see and more about how we see ourselves. Susan Komives and her colleagues have described a developmental shift in how people understand leadership. Many begin by linking leadership to a role or a title. But through experience, feedback and reflection, they begin to define leadership in more relational and service-oriented terms. They start to see leadership as something that happens through influence, not authority.

Together, these two perspectives—Bandura’s and Komives’s—suggest leadership learning is both social and developmental. We begin by watching others, and we grow by integrating what we’ve seen into our identity. That growth doesn’t stop once someone gains power. In fact, that’s when reflection and intentionality matter most. 

What Helps Leaders Stay the Course?

While power can distort, research and experience point to four practices that help leaders maintain perspective and connection as their influence grows.

1. Build Feedback Loops Stay self-aware by creating space for honest input. Inviting feedback should be a habit. The goal is to create a culture where people feel safe raising concerns, offering alternative views, and speaking truth to authority.

Amy Edmondson describes this as psychological safety—a condition where people believe they can share ideas or concerns without fear of negative consequences. Similarly, Heifetz and Linsky write about the importance of “productive discomfort.” Strong leaders don’t just tolerate disagreement; they welcome it as part of their growth.

2. Stay Anchored in Values

Articulate the values that guide your leadership. Write them down. Reflect on them regularly, especially after difficult decisions. Values may not prevent mistakes, but they offer a foundation for ethical recovery and clearer judgment.

Research supports this approach. Brown and Treviño found that ethical leadership—rooted in fairness, honesty, and consistency—is strongly associated with employee trust and reduced misconduct. Avolio and Gardner describe authentic leadership as being grounded in moral perspective and self-awareness, both of which help leaders act with integrity under pressure.

3. Distribute Power

Sharing power strengthens leadership. It builds credibility and trust. When leaders involve others in decision-making, they surface better ideas, reduce blind spots, and build commitment.

Pearce and Conger describe shared leadership as a process where multiple individuals lead based on expertise and context. In educational settings, Spillane found that distributed leadership supports better responsiveness and shared responsibility. The more leaders invite others to lead, the stronger the organization becomes.

4. Reflect Regularly

Self-awareness tends to fade when unchecked. That’s why leaders need regular moments of reflection. What patterns are showing up in your behavior? Are people still speaking freely around you? Are you making time to listen?

Mary Daudelin found that structured reflection helps leaders uncover blind spots and make adjustments. Reflection is another habit of good leadership that helps leaders stay connected to the people and values that matter most.

Why These Habits Matter

Each of these practices act as safeguards, helping leaders stay grounded as their influence expands.

• Feedback loops counteract the isolation that power can create.

• Values anchoring provides a compass in moments of complexity.

• Shared leadership draws wisdom from across the organization.

• Reflection reinforces humility and learning.

When practiced consistently, these habits increase the chances that power will strengthen—not erode—the qualities that made someone a leader in the first place.

The Real Work of Leadership

Leadership isn’t something we master once and for all. The moment someone gains power, the work changes, and it often gets harder.

That’s when leaders need more feedback, not less. More reflection, not more confidence. More grounding in values, not just in results.

Real leadership isn’t about gaining power. It’s about holding on to the humanity that helped you earn it.

References

Avolio, B. J., & Gardner, W. L. (2005). Authentic leadership development: Getting to the root of positive forms of leadership. The Leadership Quarterly, 16(3), 315–338.

Bandura, A. (1977). Social learning theory. Prentice Hall.

Brown, M. E., & Treviño, L. K. (2006). Ethical leadership: A review and future directions. The Leadership Quarterly, 17(6), 595–616.Daudelin, M. W. (1996). Learning from experience through reflection. Organizational Dynamics, 24(3), 36–48.

Edmondson, A. (1999). Psychological safety and learning behavior in work teams. Administrative Science Quarterly, 44(2), 350–383.

Heifetz, R. A., & Linsky, M. (2002). Leadership on the line: Staying alive through the dangers of leading. Harvard Business School Press.

Galinsky, A. D., Magee, J. C., Inesi, M. E., & Gruenfeld, D. H. (2006). Power and perspectives not taken. Psychological Science, 17(12), 1068–1074.

Keltner, D. (2016). Don’t let power corrupt you. Harvard Business Review, 94(10), 112–115.

Keltner, D., Gruenfeld, D. H., & Anderson, C. (2003). Power, approach, and inhibition. Psychological Review, 110(2), 265–284.

Komives, S. R., Owen, J. E., Longerbeam, S. D., Mainella, F. C., & Osteen, L. (2005). Developing a leadership identity: A grounded theory. Journal of College Student Development, 46(6), 593–611. https://doi.org/10.1353/csd.2005.0061

Lammers, J., Stapel, D. A., & Galinsky, A. D. (2010). Power increases hypocrisy. Psychological Science, 21(5), 737–744.

Pearce, C. L., & Conger, J. A. (2003). Shared leadership: Reframing the hows and whys of leadership. Sage.